
I. INTRODUCTION:
Cancer is a very dreaded disease that most of us shun away. The fact that the person is terminally ill is something that connotes distress, frustrations and fear. Life is beautiful that if the person is diagnosed with cancer all its meaning and beauty seem lost. The question other people ask is WHY ME? A questions that aside from seeking an answer, all the more, a statement of grief, anxiety and distress.
These questions are often left unanswered. Left to themselves alone a victim of cancer will find difficulties to understand their situation. They need other people to point out to them that somewhere in that dark moment of their lives there is a ray of hope. People who will give them comfort and to lead them back to a quality life despite of pains and the fear of impending death.
But, who will be this people? Their families can give them support but they are as much in pain as the victim. The emotional pain that the family member experienced surpasses the physical pain of the victim. Thus, they themselves is incapable of giving advice. This paper will try to point out the importance of a Center for Counseling Cancer Victims. This will try to understand the necessity of putting up a team who could empathize, understand and give counsel as objective, clear and logical as possible.
II. COUNSELING THE CANCER PATIENTS:
Cancer is defined as “a malignant tumor that tends to spread in the body; a malignant evil that corrodes slowly and fatally.”(Meriam-Webster Dictionary). When a person is terminally ill there is no medicine that he or she can still revive from her healthy conditions. Medicine was not yet able to invent or discover a medicine that can cure cancer a 100 %. All that it discovers is how to ease the pain and stop the cancer from growing. If there are cases of a patient was cured of cancer usually the case is a the wrong diagnoses of the doctor.
Thus a very clear manifestation that people who was afflicted with such diseases needs a lot of support. This support could mean emotional, psychological and the power of spiritual healing. The question is there such group of people or experts in counseling available in our society. The obvious answer in the Philippine situation is- No. Cancer patients often left at the care of their relatives in our country. But the family sometimes can be emotional in dealing with situation. It needs a counselor to also guide them in handling the situation. “ To help them to be sympathetic without being sentimental, practical without being hard-hearted, to impart hope when all seems black, to be willing to listen, to know when to keep silent and when to seek help.”
A. Understanding the Patient as a Person.
“It is important to know the person who has an illness than to know about the illness the person has.” Understanding the person is basic if we need our help to be more effective. To know the mechanics of the persons’ personality and his likes and dislikes is helpful for an effective counseling. It is also important that we clarify and name emotions, for the person we are counseling is undergoing an emotional turmoil. Being aware of the losses most specifically the loss of a healthy condition and eventually the loss of life.
We need to let the patients “recognize and accept the fact that he is terminally ill rather than ignored…” in this case it would be difficult for a member of a family for they themselves sometimes deny the facts. It is important to determine the stages of grief of the person. An effective counselor must lead the patient from the stage of denial to acceptance. This process doesn’t only involve the patient itself but also of the family who is facing a possible monetary bankruptcy plus emotional struggle.
“Sharing our anxiety about situations at home and asking for their advice can help those who are ill to feel that they still have a contribution to make and a role to play. But in the stage of the illness when the patient is still coming to terms with the diagnosis and coping with initial treatment, that kind of sharing needs to be done wisely and with care.”
In this point “it is particularly helpful to have our own group supporters- the reserve team, who will listen to us and give us practical and emotional help. Being one step removed from the situation and less emotionally involve, it is easier for them to see things more clearly and to be sympathetic, practical and positive.” In this point a counseling center which would train people who will counsel them is very important. Thus, the need for a counseling center for cancer victims.
B. The Need for a Center for Counseling.
“To be saddled with the torture of cancer is enough; to have no one there to help is almost beyond human endurance. We need counseling – real counseling from people in the helping profession.” Indeed to be left alone and no body to talk to, to share our feelings, fears, anxiety, frustration etc. is as painful as cancer or even more.
We are not just dealing here with a simple disease but a dangerous illness that will cause our life. This implies that we need expert in clinical and psychological counseling. “We need counselors who understand that the threat of death affects every aspect of the victims’ lives and the lives of those around them. We need counselors who are willing to give the greatest effort and understanding possible.”
We need to put the effort of this experts and professionals in the fields to help us battle cancer especially the gamut of human emotions in reaction to facing cancer and the possibility of death. Fear is so powerful that it can immobilize a patient. Moreover, continuous exposure to emotional stress can help deteriorate the patients’ condition. Wellness is the key to total restoration of health. A healthy emotional and psychological well being is an important factor to healing or if not prolonging of life, this need to be clarified and given to the patient by the expert.
A center according to Wayne Hilburn should include a lawyer, an oncologist, a psychiatrist, a psychologist and someone from the religious sector. These people will help together and share their resources to counsel a victim of cancer.
In as much as possible the government should also include in its budget the putting up of counseling centers for it also under the basic needs of people with sickness which the state should protect.
The center should focus more on the counseling of the members of the family. The family should be the first to be counseled since they are the ones’ who are living with the patient and interaction for this matter is on the daily basis. The family of the cancer patient must need to know how to deal with the victims, understand its temperaments and also to know the sickness.
Counseling should be done not only after the diagnosis but also if the person with cancer died. Counseling should be done after. For Filipinos with a very close family ties the death of a member of a family is a very big loss. It is recommended that counselor would try to point out the stages of grief. The main task of the counselor is to prepare the family for the eventual dying of the patient so that if that time comes the emotional impact would have lesser gravity.
For Filipinos who have a high regard to religion, it is easier for them to accept the death of a love one as the will of God. Besides having close relatives and friends to journey with them they can slowly overcome the situation.
III. CONCLUSION:
The need for a center for counseling patients with cancer is very important. I would like to put so much emphasis on counseling the family. The family is the one the feel the emotional burden of seeing a member of a family suffering and dying of cancer. The work of the counselor is to help the family by way of giving them tips in hoe to deal with cancer patients from time to time a visit to cancer patient is also necessary.
Putting the divine aspect is very important. Spiritual healing is much needed during this time. Thus, a minister is needed to help the patient prepare in facing God. It needs to be instilling to the minds of the members of the family and the cancer patient that death should not be fear of. It seems to me that the patient and the family are more afraid of death than cancer. This must be given emphasis. But the very great help that the center can give is to empathize with the family.
In the Philipines where people have a close knit family bond the center will perform an advisory or consultative work. The family will be the one to work for the counseling. Unlike in America where the culture is very selfish and people put their oldies and sick member of the family in nursing care, the center have to have a one on one session with the patients.
VI REFERENCES:
“LIVE THE PAIN, LEARN THE HOPE” A Beginner’s Guide to Cancer counseling; Hilburn, Wayne May 2, 2000
“FACE TO FACE WITH CANCER” Comfort and practical advice for sufferers and carers; Stroud, Marion, OFM Literature Inc. Mandaluyong City, Metro Manila Philippines 2006.
http://www.actionartz.com/counselingservices.htm “Contemporary Counseling Center”
“Patient and Family Counseling” The Patricia Trost Friedler http://www.som.tulane.edu/cancer/friedler.html#counseling
Cancer Counseling Center